Black Heart Inertia - Incubus

aaaaaaaaah, i soooo love this band...despite the skinny look Brandon Boyd is still effin HOT!

tsssss.

You're a mountain
that i'd like to climb
Not to conquer
but to share in the view

im gonna buy that Monuments and Melodies as soon as i have moolah!
too bad i missed their concert...oh well,i got work....haha,maybe next time - ugh, i hope there is.

erpat's day...

Well,i really dont have any intention to blog about my father..then i cant help it, so before i do (which i promise myself na it'll be short lang) let me greet all the father's out there.... Happy Father's Day!

We went to divisoria last Saturday (shopping galore), we bought a shirt for him as a gift. But few days before this day....they had a HUGE fight again...coz mama's saying he got a mistress, erpat is denying it (or he could be saying the truth - idk)...and in return Papa is accusing Mama.
Accusing her that she was the one who send that message to the girl ("mistress").

Ang weird kasi eh (SMS)
Mistress : your wife texted me
erpat : what's the message?
Mistress : it doesnt matter, i'll show it to you nalang, if we see each other again...

after a long discussion between me, mama and papu...my father asked her again to forward the message.

"You're Irene from Genpact right? ur my hubby's kabit...umamin na sakin asawa ko"


--- and i was like...Pap, whoever the texter is didnt mention any names...we dont knw if that a-hole is referring to you or mama, she could be talking about someone else...might be a wrong send too, so how come Irene is saying that its mama...its like she admitted na kabit mo siya.
am i right or am i correct? so her message alone made my mama think na they really have this thingy..

after like 2 or 3 days, they're talking to each other again, still cold but then maybe they realized they need to communicate. So we had our lunch sa Max's ,my treat..and all the time my father is nakasimangot. I really didnt like it,but fine! i allowed him to be that way and just enjoy the foods. He is so weird.

ahh f*ck!i dont wanna talk about it anymore, they're old na.

My mama's only wish is that whatever my father is doing to her will not happen to me or my sister, well JP [my sister's bf] is a nice guy naman...and yeah im pretty scared that it'll happen to me.
so help me, Lord

change topic:
well, yeah im still addicted to Farm Town in facebook, just started playing Yoville too, its like SIMS daw.

Black Heart Inertia is the new single of Incubus, haaaaay, Brandon Boyd is still yummy! hihi.

If i heard it right, Mike's got a new gf...its weird coz it made me sad. I was like,thought im over him na...

sisLoraine is right...guess i am better off without him.
its a good thing Mr.Summer is always around, somehow i feel complete...
speaking of which, im talking to him now.hahaha.

somewhat waiting for someone...but i think he's not gonna come.

enihoos, im like on a strict diet.im letting go of toooo much salty foods & oily stuff. Forcing myself to eat veggies and prolly start jogging or working out again. hehe, not eating a lot of rice too. Not because i wanted to loose some weight but because i wanted to live a healthy life. And besides, Mr.Summer is telling me im not fat naman - so haha!

but then after those moments na he's been quiet i kinda felt something different.its hard to explain, but i know its not something about falling inlove with him. err, i'll figure it out sooner or later, im just gonna enjoy his presence

its a girl thing

you know when your trying to move on from someone, you're like telling yourself na you can do this without the guy's help. right?
most especially if you and that guy really doesnt have "something" , you just feel like letting go and moving on not because you feel like he doesnt love you back but because there are so many factors that you consider and its enough to just...let go.

so that's what i've been doing, im trying to ( like ) stay away from Mr.Summer, and been telling myself that i can do it even if we're seeing each other everyday, and doing a lot of things together.

it was all cool, i thought i was doing ok with it and ( like ) telling myself na, im getting there without him noticing that im staying away...and like being aloof to him and all that.

but when he started being quiet
that's when it hits me...

i was like, "this should be fine, it'll help me to move on...it'll be a whole lot easier for me to let go of my feelings for him..."

and the other side of me is like "im missing him, i miss the way things used to be...i miss the way he does this and that...missing everything"

i cant help but be sad about it.
which reminds me of the movie He's Just Not That Into You, can totally relate to it.
Guess girls really have this moments where in they're like blindly optimistic, we're like telling ourselves a lot of positive stuffs, nothing but good thoughts about relationships...when it all boils down to one thing,
he is just not that into you.











im only praying for one thing regarding this whole issue "help me to love him as a friend...as a friend only, if this is what our fate offers us...help me to accept it, but in the case that he feels the same way...help me make things right"

12.13 (a growing tumor)

what the heck is going on?
my 3 days off is almost over and all i ever did (aside from playing games in facebook)
is think about you.
i miss you.
and i dont know if its the kind of "missing someone" because you love them or you just miss them for no apparent reason....you know u just miss them...
im glad that during those moments that im getting bored (waiting for someone in that friggin game to hire me so i could earn more coins) you were there.

wonder what kind of spell you cast upon me to make me feel this way.

huh.i guess i wanted to love you but im scared.
scared of so many things, so as much as i wanted to tell you that...i dont know how.

the distance between us is the number 1 reason, you know i suck at long distance relationship - yep, BIG TIME!
there are times when im thinking of meeting you, but then i thought...i dont wanna put too much effort on seeing the one i like (or love) and not get anything, i guess i told you this before..."what if i see you and then fall inlove with you even more?" - what if you're not brave enough to catch me?
--the case of unrequited love
Having the lamest reason to love someone - i dont want that to happen again. Just to let you know, you taught me how to let go when im not getting what i deserve. Now, looking at the situation you're in...idk if you can cope up with everything. As you have said, you dont even have time for yourself anymore -- but,i dont know...this may sound like im underestimating your capability to love a woman despite the busy life that you have...
But (again) i was just thinking, what if our situation is like that? What if im giving in soooo much and then somewhere along the line...you cant satisfy me...definitely i would let go. I've been there twice.

And then what? if i'd let go...i'll try to forget everything that we shared. Isnt that sad?

Not unless, you give me reasonable WIIFMs (what's-in-it-for-me?) to stay....or probably you can use a very powerful charm so i wont let go. Haha,maybe that'll work.


Second of all, what if you see me and dislikes me. I've seen your ExGfs and i have to say some of them are really pretty, geeeez...i am like sooooo nothing compared to them. I got flaws too, maybe u've seen those in some women or maybe not, i dont know. But what if you wouldnt like me in person? I might as well, stay in this situation where there is the tiniest hope that you like me.

damn, you really are a tumor in my head.
the only problem that i dont wanna try to solve.

trust me i wanted to love you,i know i could.
but..if i could love you without expecting MORE , that'll be much better.
(sounds like a martyr)

and honestly im having a hard time doing that.
just like everyone else, probably just like you.

its hard to give unconditional love...
i guess no matter how much i wanted to do that, it scares me to death.

and here's the thing, i got a lot of blog entries that revealed ALL my feelings for you and you never said anything about it. I may have blog about some other guys, but its sooo much different when i talk about you.I dont know if you can see the difference.

Maybe you are just like me, you're JUST fine knowing that someone out there loves you..but afraid to take a risk. I mean, somewhat it makes you happy that im going gaga over you...but...pretending you dont care or something...i dont know...

hey,what am i saying? I dont even know if you like me,i have no idea if you're thinking of me too.

YES i am talking about you, the only guy i know that's born on the same day as i do (only in a different year). This is all about my feelings for you, i thought it died months ago but you revived it.

What do you suggest me to do?
you want me to forget about it - i will if you'll tell me to do so, but i cant do it right away.
you want me to take care of it like the way i take care of my farm - fine with me too.

Farm Town

got another game in Facebook that im addicted to.
Before, im only addicted to playing Mafia Wars then someone invited me in fashion wars...few days after i joined a friend's clan in Vampire wars, got a dog and turtle too which i dont usually check everyday.

Now, im checking on my Farm like everyday....funny coz its just a friggin game but when i had 3 or 4 wasted grapes field the other day,i felt so saaad. i didnt know that i can harvest it in like 4 hours, i should've come back to it so i could sell it and earn more coins... ahaha.

I've been thinking like where im gonna put the barn, the fences...how many rows for my rice field, tomatoes & potatoes...i got waterlillies from Vhraine (Vhonne & Lorraine), they gave me a pig and dog too...yay! ang cute nung baboy.

Hmm.
im off for 3 days,but then it'll be a busy off again...as in sleeping, plurking, blogging and yeah playing games in facebook...and i must see the last 2 episodes of Gossip Girl.buhaha.
Dont have moolah anymore to go out and pig-out.
And bad news, the Casa Medica in SM southmall got a patient positive for Swine Flu, geeeez! scary, cant go to SM anymore, they're quarantined daw eh. Good thing there's still Town Center and Ruins.haha.

I got good & sad news though.
Was able to talk to sis Dredd again, i miss her...she's really one of the sweetest friend in the whole wide world :)
Havent talk to her for like weeks, ayun nga lang sad news. But i know she's a strong woman, sisiw lang daw un sabi niya.Haha.

Kahit na maulan ngaun, Mr.Summer is still friggin hot. LOL.
ok, time to go back to my farm now.

xOxO


And i've been bloghopping for quite some time now, i noticed a lot of blogs talking about the famous scandal of Hayden Kho, i decided not to make any comment about it before, coz its already the talk of the town...we talk about it at work, here at home...there's this incident one time i was walking somewhere i dont remember na where, but its a public place, there's this group of people talking about the scandal, making comments about it, i got sick of hearing so much about it, i saw the 3 videos...and just like everybody else, though the girls pretty much enjoyed doing it, i feel sorry for them. Both of them seemed to be so inlove with this guy...those intimate moments should always be kept PRIVATE!
and to the girl(s) who said negative stuff about the 2 girls you might wanna think again. Imagine yourself in their shoes, they might be at fault too but its really not necessary to make so much negative comments about it.



Here comes the rainy season, i am so loving the cold weather...

have a question

do you love me?

According to the stars Cancers and Sagittarians are better off as friends...they dont do well as lovers -- i should keep this in my head all the time.
sagittarius + sagittarius is a good match daw [naniwala naman daw ako]



i miss him.